Sealabian Civil War

The Sealabian Civil War is an event took place during the episode Let 'Em Eat Corn. The conflict began shortly after Captain Bellorphon "Tornado" Shanks declared that Sealab would secede from the United States and became a sovereign nation.

The conflict lasted a whopping five hours, with multiple small groups seceding from the newly-seceded Sealabia and forming their own countries. Two British nationals, "Fresh" and his friend, "Tasty" supplied weaponry and resources to the warring factions. The conflict ended in a stalemate, and ultimately Sealab was re-annexed the federal government.

Secession and Splinter Groups
Captain Shanks, frustrated with the high rate of taxes he had to pay as a result of running an underwater government research station, was informed by Sparks that Sealab's aquatic, subterranean location meant it could legally secede from the Federal Government. With the help of Hesh and his refined skills as a notary, Shanks successfully seceded and declared Sealab "Sealabia."

However, short after announcing to the crew that Sealabia was founded, Hesh tricked Shanks into signing a set of documents that allowed Hesh to form his own smaller nation, "Heshopolis." An enraged Shanks beat Hesh with a baseball bat, and Sparks declared that there was now a "power vacuum" and declared that he would take over Hesh's country and remain it "Sparkopolis." Much later, when a barely-conscious Hesh objected to this by saying he was still alive, Sparks decapitated him with Shank's baseball bat. A large chunk of Sealab's population joined Sparks.

Shanks declared he planned to invade Sparkopolis, but was shocked to learn that the residents of Pod Six (who the late Captain Murphy had declared "jerks") formed their own independent nation, known as Podsixia. Led by Brad, an ex of Quinn's girlfriend Debbie. Quinn, enraged upon learning this fact and astonished by Shank's incompetence, seceded himself and declared his new nation "Quinnland."

Civil War and Aftermath
A pair of British men who claimed to be weapons dealers sold nuclear missiles to Sealabia, and used the ill-gotten profit to purchase corn on the cob and premium dental work to repair their disgusting and disheveled teeth customary to citizens of England, so that they could more easily eat corn on the cob. Shanks was initially pleased, but became enraged when he discovered the men had also sold missiles to the other nations of Sealab, his enemies.

Quinn returned to his territory (made up of only his personal quarters) and was disheartened to find only Dolphin Boy had joined his newly formed nation. Quinn feared he would be totally defenseless in the event of an invasion, and was terrified when the population of Podsixia stormed into his room. However, Brad revealed that he respected Quinn, and the two bonded over Debbie's whorishness. The nation of Quinnland was absorbed into Podsixia.

Meanwhile, in Sparkopolis, a war-hungry Sparks was ready to launch missiles at the other territories, but became frustrated when Stormy revealed that the keys to the missiles were stuck on Stormy's dresser. Stormy revealed his dresser was a sentient alien robot at war with his toilet, which was also an alien robot that who had seceded from him. Sparks then murdered Stormy with a baseball bat. Later, Sparks was able to retrieve the keys.

Sealabia, Sparkopolis and Podsixia were locked in a Mexican stand-off, all countries armed with nuclear weapons and aiming at each other. The missiles were fired by all the countries at the same time (including the dresser and the toilet) but, when they landed, they simply bounced off Sealab's glass dome and floated away, turning out to be duds. Fresh and Tasty had successfully scammed Sealab and sang a song about how much they loved their new teeth and eating corn on the cob.

With no working weapons, no infrastructure or resources and no money, the independent nations dissolved and Sealab once again became a territory of the United States government after the universal reset at the end of every Sealab episode.

Nation States and Factions

 * Sealabia: Commanded by Tornado Shanks, the first nation formed.
 * Heshopolis: The first splinter faction created. Dissolved after the death of their leader, Hesh.
 * Sparkopolis: The newly reclaimed Heshopolis, reclaimed and renamed by Sparks.
 * Podsixia: A nation formed by the residents of Pod Six, who are jerks. Later dubbed "The People's Republic of Quinnsixia."
 * Quinnland: A nation formed by Quinn and Dolphin boy, later absorbed into Podsixia.
 * Unnamed Dresser Nation: Formed by Stormy's transforming robot dresser.
 * Unnamed Toilet Nation: Formed by Stormy's transforming robot toilet.

Causalities

 * Hesh: Brutally beaten by Tornado Shanks and ultimately murdered by Sparks.
 * Stormy Waters: Killed by an angered Sparks after the secession of Stormy's dresser and toilet.
 * Doplhin Boy: Killed when hit over the head by a stray dud missile, ironically becoming the only actual fatality caused by them.